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Noctors aka “Nurse doctors”

December 23, 2009 30 comments

Did you know that there are currently 101 doctorate of nursing programs in the United States accepting patients???? ONE HUNDRED AND ONE! This is nearly as many as the number of allopathic medical schools in the entire United States. Here is the official list according to the American Association of Colleges of Nursing. There is no escaping NP’s. They have even managed to make headway as far up and away as the Yukon!
Yes, you too can enter the Texas Woman’s University (just make sure you were able to crack a whopping 960 on the GRE to qualify) and a mere 46 credits later (don’t worry you will never have to take more than 9 credits a semester) and you too can call yourself DOCTOR. If you fear that 46 credits maybe too much of an academic burden, then you can always apply to the Frontier School of Midwifery and Family Nursing as they only require 33 credits to achieve the doctorate! Or maybe you hate having to sit in class. Well thanks to the the University of Cincinnati you can do your entire doctorate online (plus no GRE needed)!  I had to pull out my old med school transcript to calm myself down since I knew working my butt off for a doctorate certainly required more than the above.  Guess what?  I can safely say that I did not lose my mind- just shy of 160 credits it was.

Oh and it gets better. There are another ONE HUNDRED additional noctor programs in the planning stages. So if you had concerns that your credentials were not competitive enough, you could always wait a couple years since there will be nearly double the spots.

Between greater govt control of healthcare in this country and the explosion of allied professionals, primary care salaries are not going up anytime in the foreseeable future while inflation and compensations in other occupations will only increase. This is chimpanzee economics. To add insult to injury, while your recently graduated med student is working like a racehorse in residency barely able to pay the minimum (assuming he is not in deferment or forebearance) on his quarter of a million dollar student loan balance, your noctor zipped through a one week residency (at the end of the first paragraph in this article) and is humming away making just shy of your future attending salary with a fraction of the loans. Actually, while you were sitting in lecture all day racking up those loans, your future NP was busy at work full time bringing in a nice salary.  I will leave it to one recent NP grad’s remarks about her noctor program over on allnurses.com, “University of Cincinnati (UC) is 100% on-line, it allows me to continue to work!” Someone tell me how it is even possible to learn all there is to know in medicine entirely online and while holding a job? Please tell me I am dying to know, as are your future patients whom many of you will be independently treating.

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